Am I Expired?

During my undergrad time, I worked continuously for 3-4 days during final exams or project submissions, including sleepless nights. Read tooth breaking journals for new things though that will not bring me any thing in grade sheet. Passed whole night for discover the magic coding and surprised by sudden morning and run for university without sleep. Playing with the books of algorithm or number theory bought packs of pleasure like playing with kite. Those days are gone.

I wake up and sit to the pc only for music. Reading makes my eyes clumsy. Passing a sleepless night make my day horrible. Journal and tech blogs are like devils, I don’t want to see them unless there is a big need. I am getting lazy day by day. Whats happening to me. Is that the same with all my friends? or simply to me.

Am I Expired? are those days I pack to museum?

Life in a loop

Wake up at 3.01 am. Turn on the light. Make a mug of hard black coffee. Look at monitor. Its a new day, begins with music of my PC. 5.00 am get ready for jogging. 5.15 am start running. 6.15 am back to home. 6.30 breakfast. 7.00 take a shower and get ready for driving. 7.30 good bye home. 8.00am start driving. 8.30 come to office. 6.30pm go back to home. 7.00pm do some house hold regular work. 8.15-8.30 good night.

Hmm. sometimes I am confused. I am a Bio-Machine or a human being. Isn’t the same thing happen with most of you? What is the meaning of life to us? Do we come to this world to be a machine who take foods in place of oil or electricity? What our soul thrust for? A good job? A sound living? Nice, expensive car or a post flat? Being immigrant to a rich country? Some super power to make all slave?

Or seeing a old man fighting with life to survive? watching a mother sleeping with her child in footpath of crowd roads? Biting a bus conductor for 1 taka and voting a political figure for looting millions? Living in this hell that we made by our own hand?

I don’t know? Is there no one to answer?